Good morning, Amazon!!!!

Someone I know got an email from Amazon today saying that customers who had purchased a certain other book also purchased my book and would he, the receiver of this message, like to join this select group? He did and god bless him. That made me think of further demographic marketing that Amazon could do.

Customers who purchased COUPON GIRL have frequently been identified as asylum inmates. Would you like to include ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST and/or GIRL INTERRUPTED in your shipment?

Customers who purchased COUPON GIRL have frequently been identified in police line-ups. Click here if you would like to include SERPICO or THE GODFATHER with your purchase.

Customers who purchased COUPON GIRL experienced good luck within ten days of delivery. Please circulate to ten of your friends.

Customers who declined purchase of COUPON GIRL frequently experienced bad luck within one hour, particularly in regard to septic systems, plumbing, and heartburn. We hope you will reconsider.

It's getting pretty exciting, this book stuff, I will admit. In case I would get too giddy, fate has seen to it that I must read approximately 80 student research papers. That will take the life out of me without a doubt. Unless any of my students are reading this--YOUR paper will be the one that turns me around and brings me to life. Please avoid using the following:

She was a women in love.

That's like believing in Santa Claus and the Eastern Bunny.

She was a women you could talk to.

My uncle unfortunately pasted away several years ago. [ed. note: HAR, too much Elmer's?]

When a student wants there grade to be high, they have to study more then they want to study so there grade can be higher then they thought before they started studying.

She was a women who could really spell.

I still need an outfit for the first book signing. I simply must have something chic for a change. As I walk through Filene's and even Lord & Taylor I am gripped with indecision. It all looks so, well, may I say ugly? I don't look good in orange or puke green. The only things I've liked have been beach cover-ups. Do you think I could wear one?

I did buy new shoes the other day and they killed my feet the first day.

As Jo says in LITTLE WOMEN, let us be elegant or die.

A bientot