Saturday, June 05, 2010

Your Tattoo Looks Stupid

I don't mean that you are stupid.

I don't mean that.

But I am here to tell you the truth.

Do you remember ten years ago? Do you remember any of the styles that you wore then? Baseball caps? Certain jeans? Fashions?

Do you wear many of those now?

I didn't think so.

They were fun and you loved them. But you wouldn't wear them NOW. You want to look better than that. You've moved on.

Do you think your tattoo will be any different?

Don't put somebody's name permanently on your body. If they are a dead relative, you won't bring them back. You won't honor them. You won't accomplish anything for them. You'll just wish you hadn't done it.
See full size image

Your mother doesn't want her name on your arm. Or your wrist. Or anywhere. Cattle wear brands because there's no other way to tell people who their owner is.

They're too stupid.

Show honor to your mother in other ways. Take her to lunch. Send her flowers. Don't disfigure yourself.

If the subject of your tattoo is the love of your life right now, consider that one in two marriages end in divorce. Good chance that person will be long gone in ten years. You're better off wearing a ring. It signifies your love, you can wear it everywhere, and you can get rid of it when and if.

It looks like you have the Sunday funny papers going up and down your legs.

Wipe that off, I always think.

But you can't.

For women, the stakes are even higher.
Megan Fox tattoos A cute little butterfly in a tender spot seems sexy right now. In ten years, when you've moved on from Ricky the Rebel-Dude to the venture capitalist with the cool place on Long Island, it might be a very unwelcome surprise.

Do you like birthmarks? That's what tattoos look like.

This has been said by many, but I'll say it again. How do you think the lovely rose will look when you are 40 or 50? I"ll tell you how it will look.



Old Hippie.

I'll stop now.

I saw a lot of these in my recent time spent in airports. And I know my students love tats. I accept that. And probably their parents try to tell them not to do it.

But they are parents and so of course don't know anything.

Certain things in life, your friends won't tell you. They still want to be your friend, that's why. Some things only your mother will tell you. You have bad breath, dear. Don't use your fork like that. Sit up straight--you're hunched over and look bad.
We all need someone to tell us stuff like this.

So I'm telling you.
A bientot
don't hate me


At 1:42 AM , Blogger Kay McKenzie Cooke said...

Amen to all that! Thankfully (so far) none of my childer have one ... I hope that they ask my opinion before they do it ... This should be required reading for all young people considering getting a tattoo.

At 7:32 AM , Blogger Becky Willis Motew said...

Thank you, Kay! My kids don't have them either, but the the next generation, who knows.

At 9:07 PM , Blogger sandman1 said...

I kind of understand the motivations behind them, but personally I just don't get the aesthetic. They almost never look good to me and even when they aren't hideous, why would you want to be stuck that way permanently when the same effect can be had temporarily?

There is someone in my family with one -- an older guy now, with a faded anchor on his forearm. But that's an old-school, got-it-in-the-Navy tattoo and it somehow seems different to me. I still wouldn't want one.

In the movie Eastern Promises, the thugs had them all over their bodies as permanent proof of their exploits in prisons and such. That seems sensible I guess, you know, if you want to be a hit man for the Russian mob. Since I don't, though, I sure would prefer not to have any pretend-tough-guy tattoos if I had the misfortune to be in a beef with someone who was!

At 7:09 AM , Blogger Becky Willis Motew said...

Glad to hear you say that, sm. I see so many of them at school, I couldn't help myself. Haven't seen that movie.

At 6:54 PM , Blogger Mark said...

My old boss, her boyfriend proposed to her by getting a tattoo on his chest: Marry me Karen.

Being a sub-editor, she wanted to get out a red pen and put a comma after "Marry me". Still, it worked out okay - they're now happily married.

At 7:49 PM , Blogger Becky Willis Motew said...

Wow, great story, Mark! He must have been pretty confident of her answer. Wonder how she likes it every day.

At 12:33 AM , Anonymous brittany said...

the author of this article seems extremely bitter.

First and foremost, there are probably a lot of people out there that can not explain their reasoning for getting a tattoo, expect for they just simply wanted one. However, there are many more than can give you an upfront straight answer to this question. Like, a lot of people like to get a tattoo to remind them of some stage in their life or to help them remember something special or important that has happened to them. Others get tattoos to express love or feelings about something. While many others get tattoos to remember loved ones or someone they have lost. Also some people just simply like the art of tattooing and think of tattoos as an accessory like a piece of jewelry or something to that effect. While others get tattoos to show that they belong to a certain group or organization.

In conclusion, people get tattoos for various reasons and most of them have nothing to do with being a hoodlum or a out of control, bad, stealing, person. So the next time you see someone with a tattoo, try not to judge them. Their tattoo more than likely represents something special or important that has happened in their life and you should not judge them. Like Thumper's mother said, if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all.

At 8:17 AM , Blogger Becky Willis Motew said...

Hey Brittany, you might be right about Thumper's mother and I thought hard about saying anything. But that's the fun of having the blog--I get to say what I think.

I never doubted the sincerity of the tattoo-getter.

That was not the issue.

Thanks for your opinion, though. I appreciate it.

At 3:25 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ah, I wouldn't go so far as to say the writer is bitter. But it does read as close minded an condescending. Many people consider it a form of art. I am a tattoo artist and have converted after being a mainstream artist for most of my life. Mainstream art is a joke. It realy is. With the advent of ultra modernism and contemporary, there is no love for traditional imagery. Except the genre of tattoo. It is ART, plain and simple, though obviously not for everyone.
As far as 'how is that going to look when you're 50, 60, 70, etc...' well, face it: None of us look too hot at that age. If the skin is saggy enough to ruin the tattoo, no one wants to look at it anyway so where's the harm?
I take it back. The writer does sound a little bitter, or at least, not very gracious when it comes to tolerating things beyond her grasp.

At 9:39 AM , Blogger Becky Willis Motew said...

You're certainly right, anon, that I don't get it.

And you ask where's the harm? It's the difference between being old and saggy and old and saggy and a laughingstock.

Again, it's my opinion.

It's the permanence of it that is bad in my view, not the "art."


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