Is Anyone Working?
What is the main thing all these stores have in common?
Yes of course they are fine examples of American commerce. All spend thousands, let's call it hundreds of thousands, on advertising to get you in their stores.
But the main thing, the one standout trait of all of them is:
NO ONE WILL WAIT ON YOU WHEN YOU GET THERE.
Finding a salesperson to answer your question is something like a treasure hunt. Or Where's Waldo?
Nope. Not anywhere near the cash register [don't make me LAUGH].
Not anywhere in the aisles.
Not within hearing distance since I have abandoned my precious customer dignity and begun screaming--ANYONE HERE? HELLO?
"Excuse me, do you work here?" will not win you friends and can win you enemies.
And you can forget about calling on the phone.
FOR A MEMBER OF THE SALES TEAM, PRESS ONE AND HOLD YOUR BREATH.
FOR THE FRONT DESK, PRESS TWO AND BEGIN YOUR MANICURE.
FOR STORE EXECUTIVE OFFICES, PRESS THREE AND READ CHAPTER THREE OF WAR AND PEACE.
FOR INFORMATION ON PRODUCTS AND SERVICES, PRESS FOUR AND PRACTICE ZEN MEDITATION.
FOR ANYTHING THAT REQUIRES A HUMAN, PRESS FIVE, EAT SHIT, AND DIE.
All right, all right. I know you get it, dear reader.
I do feel a little guilty whining and complaining when I myself am not working right now.
But it's part of the fun.
Living the Dream
love,
4 Comments:
EVERYONE is on holiday ... in the Northern hemisphere anyway. Over here we're slogging away, living the nightmare!
HAR, Kay. Living the Nightmare is cracking me up. Not that I'm not sympathetic....hugs,
b
The question is "Are you working?" - Get that house cleaned!
So true. And when you actually find a sales assistant, what's the bet that they know nothing about the products? (Probably new at the job and haven't learnt to hide behind the displays yet.)
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